Just watched Taare Zameen pe for the umpteenth time yesterday.Yesterday was under the pretext of my Mum not having watched the movie.the movie reminded me of the glorious yesteryears.Am sure everyone who watched it felt the same...all those naughty pranks,irate daddies,worried mummies musing"what will happen to this kid!!"
RC i guess was the one more shouted at than i was.He was like water always wanting to do his own thing.I remember almost beating him up for saying that God is nonsense and Krishna is a mere story and that the almighty RC is stronger than any imagined God.That was 20 years ago..and now...where is he?As near his"powerless God" as one can get after an engineering degree, a MSc with honors from UK , and god knows how many other feathers on his cap...And the Deepa Bhat who was suposed to be a doctor is still giving exams , still musing about her purpose in life and what she should really do..."give in" to "whirledly things"
But even though I am not sad , I have a little thought nibbling on me this morning . The more I live , the more I realise two things . I still don't have a 'purpose' in my life . (Oh,all right I DO go around proclaiming that I have found my purpose...but I seem to be taking steps in exactly the opposite direction....does that make me a loony?!?!)And second , now that I have lived some more , I have lesser time to find that purpose .It is like 5 years back I was "Chill yaar . I am only 22. Only God Buddha found a purpose in life at that age." But Now I am like "Umm . I am almost 26. And I think I will find a bigger meaning in life right after a little nap. "Sure , I have phases of 'being driven' in my life . Like I wake up and say 'Right . Today I will call the Hutch Customer care people and tell them they should be looting banks in masks and not calling themselves a telecom service provider for all the scary things they are doing to my connection'. So, little purposes about getting my cell connection up , analysing whether DSP TIGER's downside is lower than ICICI's Infrastructue...hell can they be compared at alll(blurrghhhh)ironing my clothes for the next day and such micro sized things dot my day. But there is nothing which connects all these dots ...I think and shout that I have my purpose outlined....but thats because of the fault in the Matrix's programming which makes some of us come around once in a while once our souls have been recycled enough number of times-enough to make us raw....as raw as we were on the day we were born.We(meaning I and such other poor confused souls like moi) have those short glimpses of utopia...and take as many steps forward ..but then stop.What is real?the fraction of a glimpse,or what i live everyday ..because of the glimpse is the real thing then all these dots are ,,well just a means to pass time...do i want to merely pass time,going on through a drudgeous life? or do i want to make those glimpses real and these dots a mere prop?!?!Do i want to be Neo?or some common mortal stuck in the Matrix?!!
